A Word From The Wise

Besides being a curiosity in these parts because I have white skin, I am also a curiosity because I am a single woman.  No matter where I go, eventually the talk turns to the topic of my marital status.

Such was the case in Babuan, when Urksilla, mother of 12, asked me about being married.  I replied that I was not.  She asked why I was not.  “I don’t know,” I said in a sincerely bemused way.  She pondered this answer for a second and replied, “Maybe it is because you don’t speak the right language.”


  1. Sandykins said,

    August 30, 2010 at 12:27 pm

    LOLOLololol – made my Monday. Went to the house, let Max out for a little adventure while we cleaned up the garden a bit. Your kitties are getting chubby and are anxiously awaiting your return. See you soon.

  2. mnamna said,

    August 30, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    I have other theories… 🙂

    Can’t wait for you to get back and hear some stories over some tequila.

  3. Gertrudis said,

    August 30, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    Language – smanguage I say!!! Now you can clearly see the differences in our cultures! (What, I have a choice, and can say “NO” I dont want to be with you Mr. Man) Can you imagine bringing these girls, moms, ladies back to the states with you? they would proably be reacting similarly to how your reacting being there, dont cha think…. Sometimes when reading your recent entries, it seems you wish that you could be alot like Dorthy and click your heels and repeating three times “there’s no place like home…..” Remember, you now see the light towards your jouney coming towards the end but that’s only in the physical sense. Remeber why you wanted to be there, what low bearing fruit can you pick to make life a better place for those who “want” to have a voice. You being there is infectious. the good news is there’s no antibiotic! LOL Unless you forget your water you kucklehead!! bet that will never happen again. 🙂 Oh, nice to know you’re fender fluff on the motor bike… I know you were clearly a hurtin unit not only in the gluts but lower back (belle to make note for chiropractor appt). Ouch, Ouch, Ouch!! Also, note what would you bring differently or the same when you return or advise another person who wants to journey similarly or continue in your path… things/items to make life easier/harder. Great job my friend. Lisa Ling would be proud of you and yes, “ONE PERSON CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE”! I would recommended spending some time alone for a few day upon your re-entry back into the States (AMERICA) to decompress/reacclimate. Time alone: no friends, no phones, no emails, no visitors. Strongly suggesting: something to think about. Just taking lots of showers, getting lots of sleep, drinking lots of water, and journeling, journeling, journeling. Once you let the above in, you’ll have a hell of a time capturing the epilogue of this experience. Carry on my Mighty Thor-ette!!!!

  4. Belle said,

    August 31, 2010 at 2:17 am

    Catherine, I love your voice. Thanks for the advice. I think it only fair to add here that Urksilla’s comment was made not in an accusing way – as in I have chosen the wrong path in being single – but that she was earnestly considering the situation and offered her perspective. I thought it was absolutely charming, and I think if you met her you would like her as much as I do. The women here are very strong, and while married, are only dependent on the men in a social sense; otherwise, they run everything, do everything. And mind you, Urksilla is sending her 6 daughters to school – has to pay for them to go to school, so she obviously understands the importance of education and choice. But thanks so much for your take on this. And I will definitely think about your advice. M’wah!

  5. Sandykins said,

    August 31, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    I had to laugh at her comment because it was so endearing.

  6. Gertrudis said,

    September 1, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    Belle, thanks for the added response. It warms my heart to know the women are very strong including they run everything and do everything. Sounds like Urksilla has a lot on her plate managing 6 daughters… Im revising my thinking to “Frontier Woman” is globally instead of just on the range….. All the best + take good care!

  7. Belle said,

    September 6, 2010 at 3:21 am

    CORRECTION: Government schools here are free, and Urksilla’s daughters attend government schools. However, I don’t think that detracts from the fact that education is very important to families here.

Post a Comment